She was my teacher at school, as well as at home. She urged me to learn and to do the best I could do. For her, I wanted to learn and be the best I could be. When I needed a boost or an encouraging smile, I only had to look her way. She always had hope for a brighter day. She was my north star and my rainbow of hope. She strove with me in all that I did, not letting me give up on anything. Somehow, she knew I would eventually succeed. When I didn't succeed, she was there to help me start over again. She taught me that life is a circle and love is a gain. She read me the rules and forbade me to cheat.
She gave me birth and helped me become my own person. She gave me strength to stand alone and all the confidence to make it on my own. I learned to accept my idealism with her reality, my tolerances with her intolerances, and my intolerances with her tolerances. We grew together and formed a bond that could neither be broken nor ever forgotten. She took on my trials. I am disappointed that I could not return the favor.
My goal is to make sure she would have been proud of me. She taught me to be my own person. Hopefully, I will prove myself worthy of her love as my life becomes one I must live myself. She gave me life. I became my own person. She gave me a reason to live. I go on living. She gave me a goal to reach. I am still reaching!
Often I shall think back and remember all the fun and happy times we shared. I realize my path is not a path at all---rather a long, dimly lit road. I must walk it alone, and alone I will. If I stumble and fall, I shall strive to pick myself up as she did for me in the past.
She died on January 26, 1980, at the age of thirty-seven years. This was the worst time in my life. I never told her "Goodbye" because deep in my heart, I know I shall see her again someday. The person I will always remember in my mother, Margaret Dianne Shrouder Brown!
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